Failing

Exams week is almost over for us here at UST. Some are sighing, some are planning to go see a movie or spa date or whatever with friends as a form of celebration, because hey, we just went through a week of stress and sleep deprivation. However, there are some - actually, a lot - of peeps who are still going through stress and sleep deprivation, because they're worried about failing.

Everyone's worried about failing, except if you're from this certain university and you got a lot of cash. Everyone, at some point of their lives, had two to three days to a week of stress slaving over how his/her parents are gonna kill him/her when he/she fails a class. It's natural. Why?

1. We're social creatures and we care about our self-image
And failing means a negative self-image. For some, it's easy to manage. When I failed my Trigonometry class in freshman year, I was like, "meh". It's just, you know, a failed class. I can always take it again, and when I do, I now know what to do. On the other hand, some people take failed classes very seriously. I know one person who was at a brink of a suicidal attempt (no, not redundant. I meant she never attempted suicide, just close to it) when she failed a certain class.

2. We're ashamed of the failure when compared to the work and effort the people around us do to help us
That's heavy. For some reason, we're hard wired to be considerate of other people, especially their efforts for us. I think it's a survival or a culture thing, like if you recognize someone do something good for you, you might as well do something good for him. Otherwise, the system won't work and good and effortful people will become extinct.

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So I feel like I'm failing. What now?


Einstein once said, "We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them". That's basically it.

I'm failing my classes this semester. I missed the only test for a certain class, and I don't think I did well for the prelim exams. I have a lot of absences. I didn't finish studying for a test that's hours away. My lab reports all have failing grades. I'm too busy and preoccupied with all my other commitments. And I have a party to go to tomorrow, and I still don't know what to freaking wear.

But I can't think about that now, not like that. Because if I do think about how my life is losing control, how I'm failing things that are supposed to be my priority, I'll never solve my problems because I'd be too stressed out to think clearly. I won't be able to fix my schedule because I'd be too bummed how my schedule never works. I won't be able to plan a new studying strategy because I'd be too depressed that my parents will kill me and I won't finish my degree on time, if ever I still finish my degree. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Don't get me wrong, it's not about tuning out. Being optimistic isn't tuning out, pretending there's no problem. That's denial. What we're trying to accomplish here is fixing your mindset to help you concentrate, because a stressful mindset can't do that.

Again, what now?

Aba, ewan. What do you think?